holmes: well, I have only just heard the facts, but my mind is made up.
lestrade: oh, indeed! then you think that the serpentine plays no part in the matter?
H: I think it very unlikely.
L: then perhaps you will kindly explain how it is that we found this in it?
(he opened his bag as he spoke, and tumbled onto the floor a wedding dress of watered silk, a pair of white satin shoes, and a bride's wreath and veil, all discoloured and soaked in water.)
L: There. (said he, putting a new wedding-ring upon the top of the pile.) There is a little nut for you to crack, Master Holmes.
H: Oh, indeed! (said my friend, blowing blue rings into the air.) You dragged them from the serpentine?
L: No. They were found floating near the margin by a park keeper. they have been identified as her clothes, and it seemed to me that if the clothes were there the body would not be far off.
H: by that same brilliant reasoning, every man's body is to be found in the neighbourhood of his wardrobe. and pray what did you hope to arrive at through this?
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he was a sane looking gentleman with a crooked, scottish nose. it diverged from the rest of his face, cold as it was, standing out like like a rouged seagull on a plate of sand.
(he was also affectively friendly and very old-gentlemanly)
he cracked his fortune cookie, i'm sure. then he stopped me and asked if i had thirty seconds to spare. then he began;
"When I took my children out for chinese food- they're all 40 or 50 now- every time we went, i would open up the cookie and say, 'isn't this amazing! my fortune cookie says, "help! I'm a prisoner in a fortune cookie factory!"'"
----
neither my brother nor my father were much amused by above anecdotes.
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5 comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
i AM amused
:D
well that is because you are intelligent and female (so as to not be too harsh on the men)
PS. the man told me to omit the word "chinese", as to be politically correct. but nothing stays secret for long, oh no. i think "chinese" is very politically correct.
bwahahahahaha nice
You should have told me, as I am also intelligent and female.
I somehow heard the bit about the fortune cookie second hand. I think Tala posted something about it...or was it Aves? By gum, I can't remember.
Nevertheless, it struck me as so funny I retold it to the first audience willing to listen.
I think it was small group. Yep, it was.
long live the fortune cookie! this is really getting strikingly ironic.
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